Category: Self Love

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Holistic Remedies for the Common Cold

It’s so much easier to think and read about cold remedies when you’re not sick. At least it is for me! When I’m sick, I can’t even read, let alone make some fancy concoction. This is the predicament I found myself in last week when my baby girls and myself were laid out flat with really bad colds.

Oh a cold is a cold is a cold and it’s stuffy noses and coughs, right? Well, yes, but sometimes it’s debilitating. The headache, alternating runny and stuffy nose, cough and sore throat really put me down! When it hit me (Day 1), I was kind of in shock and I just sat there, guzzling water and wiping all three of our noses. On Day 2, I was feeling worse and had to be a little more proactive, taking 6,000 IU of vitamin D3 in the morning, 2,000 mg of vitamin C every few hours and 1 Tbsp of liquid silver every four hours. I continued to drink hot lemon water with honey whenever I had the energy to make it. It all seemed to take too much effort. When I woke up still feeling horrible on Day 3, I was desperate enough to raid my arsenal. I continued with vitamin C and silver, while adding garlic tea (see below) and raw chopped garlic to my food. Drinking water, juice and tea all the while, I gradually felt myself improving. By Day 4, I was out of the house, moving around and getting things done. Day 5 found me walking in a 5k with my girlfriends, thankful for my health.

So, what did I learn from this? I need to have my remedies ready to go. I need to be more prepared for the onslaught of exhaustion that might very well prevent me from creating some healing concoctions. I need to ask for help. On Day 3, when I was in tears because I had another 11-hour day ahead of me watching my sick babies and taking care of myself, I asked my husband to chop and peel garlic before he left for work. What a help! It made all the difference, having someone give me access to the things I needed to help myself.

Interested in garlic tea? I learned to make this when I was pregnant and was nervous about what I could and couldn’t take for a cold. It’s very simple. Peel and cut 5-6 cloves of garlic. Pour boiling water over them (preferably in a one-quart mason jar) and cover (I use a pot holder). Let steep for about 30 minutes and drink up. Sometimes I add lemon and honey. Sometimes instead of water I use broth. I also reuse the garlic one or two more times, by refilling the jar with hot water.

I whole-heartedly attribute my quick turn-around to silver and garlic. However, there are some more things I could’ve done and want to be prepared to try in the future. I read this amazing article on Holistic Squid’s blog that gave me some great ideas! You can read the whole article here. I am going to invest in fermented cod liver oil and oil of oregano. I may also get some elderberry syrup. I’m inspired by the posts on Holistic Squid’s website and hope you’ll check them out too!

Just an aside, I can get you any of these supplements as a practitioner who works with Designs for Health. I am very particular about which supplements I recommend because the quality of supplements is not regulated; therefore you don’t always get what you’re paying for. Buying from a company that sells only to practitioners (like Designs for Health) or purchasing supplements and vitamins that are labeled GMP (Good Manufacturing Processes) is your best bet for getting the high quality necessary to make a difference.

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Teaching Our Daughters to Love their Bodies 

I’ve been thinking about this for a while. There have been some pictures and quotes floating around Facebook about mothers and daughters and self-love and how women were never told to love their bodies, never heard a woman say, “I love my body” and how they’re pledging to change this with the next generation. Empowering, right? So, I decided to try it. I didn’t know how much it would move me. My story is simple:
Driving to the lake one day in our swimsuits, I looked back at my 2-year old and said, “I love my body. It’s so strong and healthy and it lets me go to the lake and play! Do you love your body?” Her answer was simple and full of confidence, “Yes!”

Later that evening, my husband was giving both girls a bath and I overheard this same 2-year old say very matter-of-factly, “Daddy, I love my body. It’s very strong.” Daddy answered so clearly, “Yes, it is!” I, however, stood in the hallway, hand covering my mouth, tears flooding my eyes, wondering if this will change something in her, break some generational curse on us women, judging and despising ourselves and our bodies. I said to my husband, “Remind me, please, to say these words to them at least once every year of their lives.” He lovingly said to me, “That must have been a very powerful experience for you to say those words to her.” It was.

If I could peer into the future I would look for my daughters to be strong, powerful, beautiful, self-assured, confident women who stand for health and inner-beauty, who know their worth lies in far more than their physical appearances, while also having great love for their physical appearances. And if I could see that, I would know, I have truly made a huge difference in this world. They wouldn’t be wasting time counting calories in and calories out, or carbs, or grams of protein, or points or anything else. They’d be too busy living in their amazing bodies.

You might say, “I can’t tell my daughter I love my body because that would be a lie.” And I would ask, “What would it take for you to love your body?”

And you might answer, “After I lose 10 pounds.” Or, “When I am eating better.” Or, “When I’m a size 4.”

And I would say, lovingly, “If it was physically impossible for you to achieve that goal, and I’m not saying it is, but if it was, could you find things that you love about your body? If you had lived through a trauma or a disease that threatened to take your life, could you just be grateful that your body, the same one that’s not thin enough, not tone enough, your extraordinary body got you through it and was still alive to experience this life you have? Or does size matter more than the air you breathe? Does weight matter more than hugs and kisses and laughter?”

You might say, “I still want to be thinner.”

And I would say, “I know. You may always want that, but if today were your last day, would you want to spend it wanting to look different, or teaching your daughter to not waste her amazing life on the same goals?”

May I challenge you to say the words out loud to your daughter(s) today?

“I love my body.”

Follow it up with whatever is your loving thought about your body and is your truth for today.

“I love my body. It has eyes that let me look at you.”

“I love my body. It carried you and birthed you and provided for you and that is a miracle.”

“I love my body. It is strong and capable of lifting you high in the sky and tickling you.”

“I love my body. It is alive today and that’s one more day I get to spend with you.”

I’m not saying you have to stop wanting your body to look different, although taking the pressure off might literally take the weight off your mind and body. I’m not saying you have to stop exercising or following some diet plan, if that’s what brings you peace.

I’m saying that your body is remarkable. And THAT is beautiful.
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Eating Disorders Defined and Confronted

     Some people hear (or read) the words “Eating Disorders” and they picture an emaciated young woman, starving herself (or purging herself) to a near-death state. Unfortunately, that’s not the only make-up of disordered eating. Sometimes it’s the obsessed dieter or the person who works out all the time with an anxiety that can’t be calmed. Other times, like with myself, it’s a person who looks healthy and eats healthy and is super knowledgeable about nutrition and exercise, but can’t seem to do enough, to feel enough, to be enough in her (or his) own skin.

I’ve asked Cheryl of “Happy is the New Healthy” for permission to reprint her blog post entitled: Food for Thought: Let’s Talk… What an Eating Disorder Looks Like and When to Speak Up. Her words resonated with me deeply and I wanted to share them with you! I look forward to any comments, questions or thoughts you might have.

I want to start things off here with a bit of a story–a snippet of my story, to be specific.

When I look back on the time I spent struggling with my eating disorder, I can think of a few “rock bottom” periods. One of those was Christmas break of my second year at university. I binged and purged nearly every day of the break, sometimes multiple times a day. I worked out for at least an hour, sometimes two, every day over the break–I even remember waking up early on Christmas to get a run on the treadmill in while my family was sleeping.

But I looked “healthy.” I weighed ~160lbs (the same amount as I do now, for the record) and according to my BMI, I was overweight and had weight to lose. According to the voice in my head (Ed was screaming), I needed to lose it–yesterday.

yes, that’s my butt. It was my 20th birthday. forgive me.
I don’t think people looked at me and thought “eating disorder” even though I was totally consumed with exercising, obsessing over what I was eating, bingeing, and purging and then doing it all over again. Like I said, this was one of my rock bottom moments.

My point there is that you really cannot judge an eating disorder book by its cover. Assuming that if someone is struggling, you’ll be able to tell by looking at them is misguided at best. Eating disorders come in all shapes and sizes, suck regardless of whether or not they meet “official criteria” or fit into a box of anorexia, bulimia, or EDNOS, and are all serious. I can remember not thinking I had a real problem because I wasn’t skinny enough to meet the criteria and feeling like I had to convince my doctor and the people around me that I was going through something serious–because I didn’t feel like I looked the part.

Even if someone is overweight or obese, if their habits are disordered, that’s the issue–not their weight. It can be easy for someone who is on a weight loss journey to have justifiably f*cked up relationships with food and/or exercise when we are so busy focusing on fixing the weight problem instead of building healthy habits that will therefore lead to a healthy weight. Weight loss at all costs and getting fixated on a number without giving serious consideration to the means by which a person gets to that goal number misses the point. No wonder there are so many weight loss successes who regain all the weight, plus more. No wonder there are so many miserable newly thin people. No wonder eating disorders are everywhere.

Getting your mind sorted out–in terms of how you think about food, about exercise, about your body and about yourself–isn’t the sexy “get in shape fast” or “bikini body by Friday” kind of crap that we’re sold and that it’s so easy to get caught up in, but it is the recipe for long term happiness, health, and sanity. If you have a healthy mindset, you will get to a healthy weight. If you don’t sort this stuff out, you’re doomed to ride the diet and weight loss rollercoaster forever more. If you’re not willing to do the hard work to shift your thoughts and your beliefs, you’ll be just as unhappy regardless of where your weight falls: disordered is disordered, no matter what kind of a package it comes in.

Now that that’s off my chest, I can get to the real reason behind this post: a couple of tough conversations and some thinking about what’s the right thing to do when you’re concerned about someone who may or may not be struggling with disordered eating, whether because of how they look (not the only indication, as I pointed out above) or because of the things they say (regarding food, exercise, their bodies, weight loss, whatever).

Since it’s not easy to tell, this is automatically a touchy subject. It’s also really easy to piss someone off and/or to feed an obsession. If you comment on how small someone obsessed with getting small is getting, even if you mean it out of a “I’m scared for your life” kind of place, it can be a celebration of them achieving their goal and can reinforce their unhealthy habits and thinking. If someone isn’t ready for it, your comment can wreck a relationship.

But it can save a life.

I make my decisions off of this: I stand for health and for happiness. For everyone.  

The conversations I mentioned both touched on the issue of a person not being underweight or looking sick, hence the rant that started this post off.

In response to that and whether or not having that crucial conversation that could save a life is appropriate if someone isn’t visibly disordered or is even overweight, I say it’s not just appropriate, it’s essential.

No one deserves to have an eating disorder. Whether you’re 20lbs overweight or 20lbs underweight or right at that weight that someone or something tells you is ideal, health and happiness require a healthy mindset. I say screw the scale, screw the criteria, screw the ideal. What’s important? What you’re doing, how you’re thinking, and how you’re feeling and functioning. If these things aren’t what you’re focused on making as healthy as possible, something needs to change.

So what do you say to that person? How do you address it without supporting bad behaviours or pissing someone off?

My advice: speak from the heart and be as honest as possible.

The conversation could still go poorly, but what do you give up if you don’t enter the conversation? What are you not honouring if you keep quiet?

If you stand for your friendship, you’ll have that conversation.

If you stand for health and happiness, you’ll have that conversation.

I remember vividly two conversations–one with a friend, and one with my sister–that left me upset. I sometimes wonder if other people who knew what was going on (I don’t think I was hiding it seamlessly) held back for whatever reason–whether because I didn’t look the part or they were scared of making me mad. The conversations that I did may have upset me but they also indicated to me that I mattered and people cared about me. 

The sooner we’re willing to talk about this–and to get busy focusing on a new solution, the better. I’m sick of eating disorders, especially the socially acceptable ones. Let’s get back to what’s important and start taking care of ourselves, regardless of what we weigh. 

have you ever brought up a concern with someone around an eating disorder? how did it go?
has anyone ever brought up a concern with you? what was it like?

     If you want to read more about Cheryl and her Happy is the New Healthy blog, please visit her here: http://happyisthenewhealthy.com/

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Healing Yourself by Rewriting Your Story

     I’m a carefree woman. I love to laugh, sing, eat, play, cook, dance and make memories. I haven’t always been this person, though. And while I love my life, I have deep sadness for what I have been through.

Can I tell you a piece of my story? Without boring you with the year-by-year play-by-play, I’ll sum it up like this: From the time I was a teenager I had hang-ups about my weight. Not so strange for a teenager, you say. Not so weird for a girl, especially, right? It only got worse. Those hang-ups became motivating factors for these games I would play with myself; games that ultimately would lead me to lose weight (ah, the end justifies the means…). Whether calorie-counting, exercise-purging, starvation or other neurotic eating habits, I mastered the latest obsession with my Type-A personality and perfectionism by my side. I’ve been 98 pounds as an adult. I’ve also been 150 pounds as an adult. My roller coaster consumed me. My control soothed me. Can you relate? I promise you: dieting is not your friend.

I have to take a deep breath and remind myself that I’m not her anymore. What a relief! My sense of self was completely wrapped up in my weight, my looks, my size. How much energy I wasted on controlling my every move, bite, calorie and pound! Now, things are different and I’m thankful every day for the freedom I experience. I don’t own a scale. I am not concerned with the size of my clothes. I don’t count calories or fat grams or carbohydrates. I don’t restrict anything! I don’t work out like my life depends on it. In fact, I don’t work out at all. That sounds like too much work to me. I’m thin, active, healthy and vibrant. I’m living, not striving.

I wish I could give you a formula for what changed, but I can’t. It’s different for everyone, although I’ve pin-pointed a few key factors. I’ve learned how to eat intuitively. What I want. When I want it. I’ve learned to not eat if I’m not hungry. I’ve learned which foods agree with me and make me feel my best and which don’t serve me well at all. I’ve learned to find purpose and meaning in things far more incredible than food, weight, weight-loss and exercise. Sound good? Please, contact me if you want to know more. My program is unique, life changing and empowering. Honest.

All of this would mean nothing if I hadn’t learned the power of a story. My story. Stories others tell about me. Stories the world tells about beauty, women, sex-appeal and love. Stories are everything. If you think about it, really think about it, everything you believe is a story. What stories revolve around you, your health, your life, your purpose, your worth and your beauty? Think of facts that you know to be facts and then ask yourself how you know them to be true… it’s mind-boggling. Using narratives in healing is a way of looking inside a person to find out what their body and mind think about their illness, health, and life. Stories run deep in our body’s cellular understanding, so it makes sense that we would be operating under the rules that our particular narrative is providing for us in any given situation.

In order to experience these transformations, I had to experience deep healing. Healing is really a way of viewing a situation from a larger perspective that allows for growth where once we saw only stagnation, illness, disease, or death. When I refer to healing, I am not talking about a miraculous recovery from a disease, though this is possible; nor am I speaking about a cure. I am referring instead to the delicate balance of appreciation for life, living life to the fullest, and considering one’s purpose, as well as the purpose of whatever challenge one is facing. Change and healing lead to transformation and are journeys, not destinations. They are processes of growth to aid us in living lives of quality and depth. Change is never permanent and healing is not a cure. With these concepts in mind, consider how much hope is restored when we are no longer looking for a specific outcome but are focused on the power of the process, knowing that healing is inevitable.

Change asks us to aim for the healing, not the cure, to live for the journey, not the elusive destination. There is a huge difference between healing and cures, journeys and destinations; it is an issue of quality. Taking a journey can be likened to an adventure, one that is filled with mystery and purpose. Change is such a journey.

I’d love to hear about the changes you want to experience, the journeys you want to take. I’ll also be thinking about the changes I am trying to embody myself; changes that will redefine who I am and how I live. I love how endless the possibilities are, don’t you?